I choose to advocate for the hiring of female coaches and provide mentorship to women who are interested in sharing their time and skills teaching the next generation of female leaders. Because I am a man, people listen to me. I am choosing to use that privilege for change.
By the time our boys are just three years old, we are telling them not to cry, which is really telling them not to feel. We want to actively push back against that socialization and help our boys embrace and express their full selves and a wide range of emotion.
In the wake of #MeToo, countless organizations — from Fortune 500s to grassroots, community-based organizations — have been reaching out to ask us for tools to help them build a culture of respect, equity, and value. After two decades of doing this work, we’re thrilled to see this new level of interest — and we know that there’s still lots of work to do.
I found that no matter what app I used, no matter what safeguards were put in place, women were constantly being harassed. Men have created an environment where women are constantly on guard for the next potential boundary violation.
Actors, activists, athletes – Evan Rachel Wood, Patricia Arquette, Rainn Wilson, Matt Walsh, Zainab Salbi, Anthony Rapp, Mark Herzlich, and Jonathan Stewart – stand together to promote healthy manhood and prevent gender-based violence this Father’s Day.
Millions of young people today refuse to blindly accept “traditional” gender norms. They reject the harmful lessons of collective male socialization — the rigid set of behaviors and expectations that we call the Man Box. They are ready, willing, and able to forge a new path.
Men and boys don’t ask for, offer or accept help. It’s a direct result of our collective socialization – what we at A CALL TO MEN call the Man Box. The Man Box teaches men to always act like we have everything under control.
When we speak, people listen. Our actions send messages across college campuses and can motivate our chapters across the country to follow our lead. Our letters are a platform that give us the power to project our voices and advocate for social change.
My definition of “being a man” challenges me to speak openly and honestly about my thoughts and feelings. I’m re-learning how to speak from a truly genuine and unapologetic place. I’m identifying safe spaces to speak with other men about my experiences and to hear about theirs so we can move forward to healthier manhood on common ground.
Throughout the majority of my adolescent years I played sports so that I could have a conversation with my dad and to gain his approval of me being man enough to be his son. Even though I was blessed to reach the pinnacle of football and play in the NFL, I would say it came at the expense of having a genuine loving relationship with my dad.
I want my son to experience love, respect and support. I want him to be able to be his authentic self. I want him to be free to express his manhood however he feels most appropriately represents him. With intention and dedication, I can give him that at home. Outside the walls of the loving, supportive home we strive to create and maintain, I rely on the men and boys in our community.
A CALL TO MEN is a violence prevention organization and respected leader on issues of manhood, male socialization and its intersection with violence, and preventing violence against all women and girls.